Why? Self doubt. Not seeming to get anywhere with my photography. Be that selling prints, making money photographing people, or being creative in a compressed time frame. I can't seem to pick up a camera with any gusto. It's a chore. I shot 100GB or more of photos last year - and the year before too. I maybe only shot 30GB this year.
Lack of follow through from inspiration to completion. I just can't get idea A and subject B matched up in a "Wow I want to do that with you! that rocks!!" sort of way. Getting people to commit to working with me in an actually-showing-up fashion is tough right now, let alone my having the enthusiasm I have had in the past.
I have had successes this past year. What I think were successes, and other do too ( I think), including the Starbucks at Christmas and a month long exhibition in a restaurant in May, and some cool photoshoots, but nothing further and no real sales to speak of. Can't make that leap. I need the equivalent of someone to find me sitting at the counter in Schwab's - a la Lana Turner minus the figure n good looks :)
I also find I have little patience for people who have no sense of time or of commitment. I find if there is no money changing hands, they think little of canceling, delaying etc., and what that might do to me and my day. Working Monday to Friday again, my days off are precious to me. More and more, I find I do not suffer fools gladly.
I also am really screwed financially at the moment and need to get that sorted out. I need to move again before November 1st and don't have much in the way of options as to where I go. I can't afford much right now and with five weeks to go have not found anywhere. All that makes staring at Photoshop or being pumped to shoot a beautiful woman/ landscape/ praying mantis really difficult. My heart just isn't in it. Which I find really troubling.
So for the time being, aside from anything I have committed to doing in the near future, I am not going to take on anything new. I am stopping photos. That means no approaching anyone to shoot, or agreeing with anyone who wants to do shoots with me. Most certainly no more free shoots.
If some idea blows me away - or someone does, then I might change my mind. But really, I don't see that happening in the short term. Feel free to pitch something, you never know, but it is going to have to be killer. Don't expect too much in the way of random photos either as I have no point n shoot to carry around.
I don't like going all Emo and whining - I have done that to too many good friends already, so I will stop. But I do appreciate the thoughts and comments I have got so far from people telling me I am nuts for thinking of stopping photography altogether. I think its nuts too on several levels.
Photography is so much of who I now am, the void will be a big one. I will still blog, and will be back shooting at some point.
Mike Wood Photography